I had a very beautiful, very traditional wedding. The church was red brick, I wore white, and the men wore tuxedos. Everybody drank champagne and danced through the night – two vital factors in declaring an event a success.
But I can’t help wishing that I rode in on an elephant. Please don’t laugh because I really do. Ever since I saw the Bollywood film Bride and Prejudice, I have loved the idea of parting a sea of dancing and chanting people en route to my vows – on an elephant. A red throne on an elephant, to be precise.
It’s not just elephants that take my fancy but donkies, too. I am soon to attend the much-anticipated wedding of a friend on an island in Greece. In my head the entire festivities will resemble the film version of Mamamia! (paternity issue excluded). Which means that a small conglomerate of us are desperately trying to procure a donkey for her arrival.
It seems that my criteria for a ‘cracking wedding’ have been derived more from films as opposed to the wedding magazines I voraciously tore through as soon as the diamond hit my finger. I wait in anticipation hoping that someone will object during the ceremony when the Priest essentially asks ex-lovers and long-lost siblings to interject (Sidebar: do priests actually ask this in Australian ceremonies?). I wonder if one day the bride will not appear at the aisle and I will finally learn what actually happens at that point.
So here are the top 5 movie weddings I have been to (I mean that I have seen and wish I was at.)
Julia’s Top 5 Wedding Movies
1. Wedding Crashers (2005)
Not only was the Cleary wedding visually extraordinary – all Republican wealth and upper eastern pastel – but having Vince Vaughan and Owen Wilson crash? Perfection.
2. Mamma Mia! (2008)
A Greek Island, dancing under lanterns on cliff tops and… a donkey. Even if vows weren’t exchanged by the couple you were expecting, it was still a feel-good wedding with a soundtrack. Bonus.
3. My Best Friend’s Wedding (1997)
Any event that pre-climaxes with a cross-city chase scene is a winner with me. A large part of me liked that the “correct” couple were happily married in the end, and even more so that the jilted woman’s gay best friend did not “turn” for her (as I feared may happen). My favourite parts of the movie were, however, when the crazy cousin’s tongue froze to the genitalia of the male ice sculpture she was licking (with said crazy cousin played by Australia’s Rachel Griffiths, no less) and the younger brother sucking helium and singing “You build up my senses, like a night in the forest…”. Just like at real weddings, it’s the little touches that matter.
4. Father of the Bride (1991)
This movie deserves special mention for invoking affection towards both Steve Martin AND Diane Keaton – actors I have found in the past to be quite irritating. All in all, this was a feel good wedding. Whether you are watching it as a daughter, bride, or parent, it will leave you with the warm and fuzzies. Plus wedding planner Frank has foreshadowed almost every other camp event co-ordinator depicted on screen since. So yes, I wish I had him at my wedding, too.
5. Muriel’s Wedding (1994)
This entire movie was fantastic. It references music from the Baby Animals, it involved adulterous sex on a washing machine and the Gold Coast disguised as “Porpoise Spit”. It defined Toni Collette, it re-defined Sophie-Lee and again featured ABBA. Muriel not only got her dream wedding but her (unrealised) dream outcome, so you have to love that.
Do you agree? Which others would you choose?